Lately the world has felt really upside down.
The other night Michael and I were watching the season finale of Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. I’m kind of obsessed with him, and the show, but the finale made me a little sad. They ended with a montage of people saying F*$k you to 2016. Pretty much writing it off as a crap year.
To be honest, it wasn’t a great year for us either. We lost Eli, we paid an astronomical amount of money to the California DMV in taxes on a car that we had already paid taxes on in Colorado and had a few other setbacks as we navigated another move, another new job and the world of parenting. Top it all off with election results that were not in our favor and it did start to feel like 2016 was quickly becoming a year to forget.
So yes, I started flipping off 2016 along with everyone else as I sat on my couch.
But…then I started thinking about all this year has brought us.
First steps and first words.
Reconnecting with old friends.
Exploring a new city.
Being closer to family.
Enjoying new friendships that have fueled the sometimes lonely and long motherhood days.
Good food and a warm home to make it in.
And an ever evolving and deepening relationship with Michael.
Yes, life can throw extreme curveballs. It can make you question your decisions, it can make you question your place in the world. Not every day is filled with champagne toasts and sunset dinners.
Life is dirty diapers and spilled milk and stepping on miniature figurines with bare feet and feeling like I might lose my mind. It’s being pissy with Michael for no reason and feeling awful afterward for acting like a petulant child. It’s not feeling my best, it’s colds and back aches and heartaches. It’s not making a bigger effort then regretting it afterward.
But, life is also first “I love yous” and big, sloppy kisses. It’s snuggles and hot tea and knowing the pendulum will swing back the other way eventually. It’s healing, reseting and going to bed with the hope that I’ll wake up with more gratitude, love and patience than I had today.
This week tends to be a week of self reflection for me.
A week to dig in and remember that what seems so important presently isn’t always as important as I make it out to be.
Gratitude and thanks are amazing reminders that life is inherently good.
Come back to the heart and you won’t be mislead.
“And every day, the world will drag you by the hand yelling, “This is important! And this is important! And that! And that!” And each day, it’s up to you to yank your hand back, put it on your heart and say, “No. This is what’s important.” – Iain Thomas
Happy Thanksgiving Friends. May your holiday be filled with love, community and sweetness.